If you've followed my blog for a while, you already know I lived through a runner's worst fear. Last fall, I developed a stress fracture on top of my left foot just two weeks before the Chicago Marathon. The worst fear we all have as runners came true for me. I completed my training in the swampiest, most broiling southern summer imaginable. But, I could not make it to the start line. The DNS was a difficult pill to swallow. I still choke on that pill when I think about it now.
I didn't take my Chicago failure lying down, however. I was Fearless. I jumped in the pool and ran! I worked my way up to 2 hours and 45 minutes without stopping while keeping my heart rate in a specific zone. Other people in the pool saw me as the weird old lady...and I didn't care. I treated cycling as my easy, tempo and long runs. I was Fearless. I increased my weekend ride peaking at 60.15 miles as I attempted to duplicate the time it would take to run a marathon. For 10 weeks, I did whatever I could to save my Disney Marathon registration. I was Fearless -- with a side of crazy.
As this year's Chicago lottery entry period approached, my first thought was "no freakin' way". I didn't want any part of it! Uh uh...not interested. Tricia even questioned me about that. Let's hope she didn't save my disgraceful texted response. But then, those little wheels starting turning. {Ho, don't you want to replace that bad memory with a good one?} Hmm... {Do you want that DNS to win?} Agh!
So, here I sit with an entry into the Chicago Marathon. Being completely honest, I can't say I feel the expected exhilaration just yet. It's because it's being overshadowed by fear -- the same fear I got when deciding to run my first half or when I took that leap to do the full. What if something bad happens? What if I injure myself? And then I remember, I LIVED THROUGH THAT...and I SURVIVED. What have I got to lose? [The answer would be fear.]
I can and I will train fearlessly.
Please visit Deb and the other participating bloggers. It's fun!
And now you know you can train for a marathon without much running! Hmmm...where have I heard that before? Thanks for passing the fearless baton onto me! Dreams do come true. And we'll get to meet in October!
ReplyDeleteWe definitely both learned that lesson. It makes me wonder how to approach this training cycle. Less is more, perhaps? Speaking of training cycles -- the one time I actually followed one, it didn't work out so well.
DeleteI'm glad you faced down that Chicago Marathon! And I look forward to reading about how you conquer it!
ReplyDeleteRedemption will be sweet...I hope!
DeleteI do hope the worst is over and you do make it to the start line this time.
ReplyDeleteI had to DnS the Big Sur marathon a few years back because of an injury but I decided that okay, maybe that marathon wasn't for me. I ended up doing the wdw marathon as my first and now really have no desire to go back and complete big Sur. Maybe one day I will, but not now! -M
Part of me was glad Disney ended up being my first marathon because Disney was my first half. It felt very fitting. Full circle, right? And you know I loved it!
DeleteYou are exactly right! You've been there done that! Chicago is Yours for the taking! :)
ReplyDeleteI can surely conquer training while injured. But, I DON'T WANT to do that.
DeleteYou will love Chicago - looking forward to following as you get ready for a great and fearless race!
ReplyDeleteEveryone has great things to say about Chicago. I'm looking forward to getting there this year.
DeleteI think the real word you're looking for is determined! And yes, I think it's a good idea to replace that bad memory with a good one.
ReplyDeleteOK, agreed. 'Cause don't tell me I can't do something. I'll work tirelessly to prove you wrong. Maybe "stubborn" is the better word?
DeleteWooohoooo Chicago here you come!!
ReplyDeleteSending nothing but positive thoughts your way as you prepare and knock that fear out the window!
I think I've got something like 150 days to kick that fear to the curb. Let's get it on!
DeleteI am sure this year's will not be a DNS. Fingers crossed.
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine being that unlucky. Oh wait, yes I can. LOL. I'm going to do things a little different, so we'll see how it plays out I guess.
DeleteI love that as a mantra... I can and I will train FEARLESSLY! Think positive and good things will happen!! :)
ReplyDeleteI think I need a new momentum bracelet with the words FEARLESS on it. The one I wear now says DIG DEEP.
DeleteSomehow I missed the little detail about Chicago...or is this the first disclosure? (I'm probably late to the party LOL) Woot!!! Congrats, and happy kick-buttocks training ;-)
ReplyDeleteTraining will feel especially kick-a$$ in the nasty swampiness we call summer around here. But, if Chicago is warm again like last year -- I'll think "so what?" I do that every day!
DeleteWow! I love this last quote "What do I have to lose? the answer would be fear". That is a motivator right there!
ReplyDeleteIt may just become a mantra as training goes along.
DeleteWoohooo Chicago!! Congrats girl! You will ROCK it!!
ReplyDeleteThat's what I'm hoping for!
DeleteYou have come such a long way this year between injury and running your first marathon, that this one will be less fearful. Can't wait to follow you, I know you will rock it!
ReplyDeleteI'd really like to beat my previous time since I was still injured (or at least not properly trained) at Disney. And, beat it bad!
DeleteI refuse to think about an alternate ending. It will happen this time. It will!
ReplyDeleteYou were so incredible with all of your pool running while coming back from your injury! It truly is a runners worst fear, and you had just about the worst timing possible. I hope this year's Chicago is your redemption.
ReplyDeleteI hope so too Meagan! Fingers crossed.
DeleteI let fear win and didn't enter the lottery for the Chicago Marathon, and I'm kicking myself now...
ReplyDeleteThanks for linking up!
P.S. I love the picture of your prunie fingertips and watch!
DeleteYour son is in Chicago! That would have been a great trip and race!
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